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Wander and Wonder
 Paradise Valley (Il Paradiso) near Assisi, Italy One of my favorite things is to watch emerging “Aha!” moments. Whether it is a moment in myself or in another fellow human, being around when the “Aha!” hits is wonderful. It’s like turning a dark corner on a rainy country road, to suddenly see a bright green field lit by the low-lying sun. It takes me by surprise. Sometimes it takes going down a road less traveled. Perhaps it’s wandering around in a new city, or an unfamiliar part of your own hometown. J.R.R. Tolkien wrote, “…not all those who wander are lost…” and I would add; it is in my wandering that I sometimes find the most wonder.
Bringing it all home My middle  daughter Hannah is a senior at Royal High School in Simi Valley. In a recent English assignment, she was asked to write a personal statement. In it, she talks about a week-long summer retreat that she went on to serve families affected by disabilities. The camper she was assigned to was a young boy with Down’s syndrome. She writes, “As the families began to arrive, I stood with my camera ready to capture the first glimpse of Brycen… I picked it up held it to my right eye, my pointer finger on the button, and I stood there in amazement with a new perspective.” She concludes with, “I hope that with my photography I can touch the lives of people who are uneducated on social matters around the world. If I can capture just one moment-in-time that others would not have seen, but that could change their outlook on life, it will be the accomplishment of a lifetime. I want my art to change lives as it has changed mine.” When I read that, it was my own “Aha!” moment – a moment that made me understand that both her upbringing and her education gave her the gift to want to make a difference – through art. Where am I going with this? OK, it’s actually all about the kids. Our schools are full of students with “the-sky’s-the-limit” potential. They are like the sculptures called “The Captives.” These unfinished works of Michelangelo are caught at a point where they are emerging from the stone that they have been encased in from the beginning of time. The sculptor saw in them something that no other did… he slowly revealed the figures, but stopped short of completing the task. Arms and legs emerge from rough marble. They are struggling to free themselves. Like Hannah’s photos, they are a snapshot frozen in time. We can see the potential of the now, and the yet-to-come. Michelangelo saw in them this potential. Each student in our schools is filled with this same potential that must be nurtured, lest they be left behind like Michelangelo’s unfinished works. Sadly, the photography program at Hannah’s school has been canceled this year due to budget cuts. We must continue to support the arts in our schools and help these emerging artists and musicians to be complete in their education. One of the things I am most proud of is ACCV’s sponsorship of the educational music programs in the Conejo Valley. We are working hard to continue funding for this program and to develop more. Please support the Arts Council of the Conejo Valley. We continue being the “Voice of the Arts”, so our emerging leaders – our poets, prophets, painters and performers – have their own “Aha!” moments. With our support, they are the change our community and our world needs.
Peace,
Rich Brimer
President and CEO
Arts Council of the Conejo Valley
Here is a repost of a painting called “The other side” that. I started it in 2004. It took until 2007 to get it all finished up. I only have this video, but it is pretty nice to see it up close. If you have a current version of QuickTime on your computer (and you are NOT using Firefox on a PC) you can press the link below and watch it. This 24″ x 48″ oil painting is the biblical scene when Peter comes to shore after fishing all night long with nothing to show for his efforts. When he gets close to shore, a man standing on the shore tells him to give it another try, but on the far side of the boat. Peter is tired and has been at this all night long, but gives in and does what he knows will not yield anything. He is surprised to see that he was wrong about it and then recognizes that it is his friend Jesus that has told him this.
Some days, we just do what you are trained to do. Sometimes we are told to do differently. Against their better judgment, Peter did do what Jesus asked of him, but I am sure that they had a discussion beforehand that went something like “Well, we are the fishermen here, but if we need to toss our net over the edge of the boat again to get you to shut your mouth…” and with a “ugggh” and a toss, the net was in the water. What would YOU have done? When do you feel that God is asking you to go or do something against your better judgment?
This painting shows the provision of the provider when we think we have nothing to gain in giving it an extra go… even when Spirit compels us to keep going. Press on! I was commissioned to create this painting to show that sometimes the provision of God is just below the surface and also that he always knows where it will come from before we are nudged to act upon his Call. Peter had done everything right – all night long – and he was tired form doing the right thing with NO result. Jesus came to them to say “Keep it up”. Sometimes it seems absurd to do what you think is the “right thing”, but I have found that to keep pressing in is often the thing that is needed… that which needs to be done in order to get to the tipping point, to cause the equilibrium to go your way, to cause status quo to be not good enough. Life is hard work if we want to accomplish much or even SEE much in this world. It is always easier to “go with the flow” and just sit on a raft and float to the end of the river. I am never satisfied with this for very long. Rest and solitude is good and important for us, but real LIFE is hard work… and rewarding.
Yesterday I sent off the four completed diptychs in my “Face of Love” series. The went with John Alderson and his son Bryce to BIOLA University for an exhibit that will last the entire semester. It will be in the foyer of one of the buildings on campus. I will post photos of the display when I get them in. It seems a bit strange to send off my paintings and not be there to hang them. I fully trust John’s judgment, but still odd not to be there. ;.)
Below is the current stage of the paintings. I have not displayed the “I was Thirsty” paints ever before, and (don’t tell anyone…) there is still a bit of work to be done on it. I want to fuss a bit with the faces still, but I need a break to do some other work, so I shipped them off as is for the time being. Click on an image to view larger.
 I was thirsty - You gave me drink" 36" x 72" Oil on canvas  I was sick - You visited me 36" x 72" Oil on canvas  I was sick - You visited me 36" x 72" Oil on canvas  I was naked - You clothed me 36" x 72" Oil on canvas
 
So, as I have been reading listening and talking to others about the state of the Church and Christianity, I am beginning to understand what “deconstructionism” can mean for it. Pete Rollins (author of “How (Not) to Speak of God“) was at a talk that I attended a few months ago, and while he spoke about this (de/constructionism), I imagined a sweater floating above the ground. This is the kind of cable-knit sweater that a grandmother may have made for you because you lived in a cold region and you needed the sweater. Now that you have outgrown the sweater – and in addition, the climate has changed – the old sweater is not as useful to you as it may have been in the recent past. In my mind this sweater is on an invisible form, so you can see into the sweater at the openings of the hands, neck and waist, but where the lower part of the sweater used to be full length, it has begun to unravel into a pile of yarn on the floor below. Surrounding the sweater is a mountain scape as the sun is setting behind the clouds.
I imagine that the Church is feeling a bit like this old sweater. Now that the climate of culture is changing around us, the structure of the church is unraveling – in order to take on a new form. Perhaps it will be re-made into a vest, or a scarf or several pars of socks, but the fact of the matter is – it is changing.
Along with it, my faith is being unraveled – in a good way. It is not like I feel that it is invalid, or even being lost, but it is also being changed. The old sweater is one that I have held with high regard and cherished it since it was first given to me. Now that it is unraveling, I look forward to being able to have it made into something new. I do not yet know what it will be, but it will become useful for the time when it is ready. And as for that invisible form that I saw the sweater on… I know that the Body that the sweater once rested on is never-changing, it’s just that it is time for the garment to be up-dated.
OK, Here is a brief update to show a newly painted (not lavender) sheet and a close-up on the face.
So, I have decided to go back and rework a painting that I did about two years ago. The top one represents the painting as I had first laid it down on the canvas. Because I was so pleased with it as a first attempt to paint the human figure, and also with the fact that this is a painting of Steve, a close personal friend, who had just died of a short and desperate bout with cancer, I felt that it would have to do. Well, now with much more confidence with figure painting, I decided to pull this one out again and see where it goes. So after a couple of hours of working on it, you can see on the below image what form it is taking. I am much more pleased with this and I will continue on with the rest of the bedding to make it more neutral. Then off to the three figures in the right panel, as they too have a long way to go to get where I want them to be.
As I have my solo show coming up in October, and this series “The Face of Love” will be featured, I will also be working on finishing the final three diptychs addressing the themes of hunger, clean water and homelessness.
In some ways, my recent trip to Assisi was a passage into a new realm… a new reality for me. A realm that allowed me to be far away from all of the things that collect my attention. Passages are like thresholds in that it is what you pass over or go through to get past where you have been. Another way to look at it is like being on the edge of the ocean. While standing on the shoreline, you can see the land where you are, yet look out to the distant horizon and visualize all the potential that is unseen… all of the possibilities. We are often too busy doing the things of life that we never go to the shore, or take the time to open the door that is right in front of us. We get distracted by all of the things that one author calls the “Tyranny of the Urgent” which pulls at you from all directions… like Saint Anthony being tormented by Demons we give attention to the thing that is pulling at your attention the hardest at the moment. While having my own demons to wrestle with during my trip away, I was able to take the time needed to rest, and meditate and ponder my existence and wrestle with these angels and demons. I hope that I have returned with a clearer view of who I am and the life God has layed before me. There is still a lot of work to be done ahead, but moving forward, I plan to take more of these retreats to reflect on the goodness of God and take long walks along the seashore to meditate on the wonderful life I DO have, not be distracted by what is “missing” in my life. We all have so much!
So going with the “passage” theme, Here are some images of doors that I took while in Rome and Assisi. If anyone knows a good “passage” themed poem, feel free to post it in the comments section below. For now I insert a portion of a “Blessing for the Traveler” by John O’Donohue…
When you travel
A new silence goes with you,
And if you listen,
You will hear what your heart
Would love to say.
May you travel in an awakened way,
Gathered wisely into your inner ground;
That you may not waste the invitations
Which wait along the way to transform you.
May you travel safely, arrive refreshed,
And live your time to its fullest;
Return home more enriched, and free
To balance the gift of days which call you.
           
The stuff of Jesus’ sermon on the mount seems to be avoided by most of the church today. It is the Kingdom of Heaven on earth today that empowers us to love everyone. I do not see anywhere where Jesus tells us to “love those who come to church” or “love those who you TRY to come to church” he says “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.” Love your NEIGHBOR, not your CHRISTIAN neighbor. I think that it is only when the Kingdom of God invades our life, can we then see how to be empowered to do just that. With the Love of Christ in our hearts, as children of the King, can we openly, unconditionally love all others in His name. This helps me to see with different eyes – with eyes that have compassion on the crowds, not with eyes that only look for an opening to share the gospel. I try to love everyone and when the Father reveals something to me in the spirit, I can go to them in love and they are open to hear what I have to share. I guess what I am trying to say is that I see too many in the Church exist to share the gospel, but only do so in a way that no one wants to listen to. They share in ways that sometimes seem hateful and isolating. If we (the Church) would truly love on another, they would see through our love that there is a peace of mind that comes with that love. This is the kind of church I want to be part of… one that loves everybody – unconditionally – and in the power of the Kingdom of God, seeks out ways to live out our lives worshiping and serving the King.
Some days you just do what you are trained to do. Sometimes you are told to do differently. Against their better judgment, Peter did do what Jesus asked of him, but I am sure that they had a discussion beforehand that went something like “Well, we are the fishermen here, but if we need to toss our net over the edge of the boat again to get you to shut your mouth…” and with a “ugggh” and a toss the net was in the water. What would YOU have done? When do you feel that God is asking you to go against your better judgment?
I did this painting to show that sometimes the provision of God is just below the surface and also that he always knows where it will come from before we are nudged to act upon his Call. Peter had done everything right – all night long – and he was tired form doing the right thing with NO result. Jesus came to them to say “Keep it up”. Sometimes it seems absurd to do what you think is the “right thing”, but I have found that to keep pressing in is often the thing that is needed… that which needs to be done in order to get to the tipping point, to cause the equilibrium to go your way, to cause status quo to be not good enough. Life is hard work if we want to accomplish much or even SEE much in this world. It is always easer to “go with the flow” and just sit on a raft and float to the end of the river. I am never satisfied with this for very long. Rest is good, but real LIFE is hard work… and rewarding.
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A quote I would love to live like a river flows
Carried by the surprise of its own unfolding
~ John O’Donohue
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